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Old 06-18-2008, 07:49 PM   #71
GymnastGirl724
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

The Final Moment
written by GymnastGirl724
"Mom, all my friends are going to Camp Winnetka! Please!" I begged to my mom, on my knees. "Zoey, it costs so much money, and it's across the country! I don't want to give you up for two months." my mom said, picking up an olive green clothes hamper. My mom walked down the stairs with the hamper under her arm. I followed her, walking on my knees. "Pleeeeease, mom!" I whined. "I already told you no. And by the way, you're gonna get rugburn walking aroung like that on your knees." my mom remarked, not even looking back. I crossed my arms, sulking around the house. "Zoey, you might as well not even sulk about it, 'cause I'm not giving in." my mom said. She had me completely figured out. That was one of the reasons I loved her at times and disliked her at others. I sighed. "Zoey, tell you what. When your dad comes home, I'll talk to him about, if that'll make you happy." my mom said, rolling her crystal clear sea blue eyes. "Oh, mom, thankyouthankyouthankyou!" I squealed, rushing to hug her. My spirits soared. I ran upstairs to call Maddie, my best friend, and we talked for a while.
**************************************************************************
Soon enough, it was 5:30, when my dad comes home. He walked in with a royal blue long sleeved shirt, a gold tie with lines on it, and black pants. His hair was neatly combed, and he carried his briefcase in one hand and his cup of coffee from the morning in the other. His chocolate brown eyes sparkled in the reflection of the light. "Hey, Mike." my mom said, giving him a quick peck on the cheek as she hurried to turn off the stove. The aroma of spaghetti filled the air. I could also smell salad, tomato sauce, and hearty garlic bread. My dad sniffed the air and I knew he could smell it too. "Oh, hey kiddo! Didn't see you there." my dad said, putting his briefcase down. "Hey, Daddy!" I said, and ran over to him. I leaped into the air, and he caught me, spun me around, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, Zo." my dad said smiling, his perfect white teeth showing. "Dinner is ready!" my mom said, carrying a bowl of spaghetti to the table. I spooned some onto my plate, grabbed some salad, and took a few pieces of garlic bread. When we were all settled, my mom began to talk. "So, Mike, Zoey wants to go to a summer camp." my mom said, cutting her noodles. My dad swallowed the lump of spaghetti in his mouth. "Really? Where? What is it?" my dad shot questions left and right. "Camp Winnetka. It's for two months, in Maine. My friends say it's really fun." I quicky cut in. "I don't see why not." my dad said, taking a bite of his garlic bread. It made a crunch sound and crumbs scattered across his plate. "Well, Zoey 'accidentally' left out that it costs 8,000 dollars." my mom mentioned, looking at me. My dads eyes bulged. "Oh! Now I see why not." my dad said. "Tell ya what, sport. You finish up your dinner and go upstairs. Your mom and I will make a desiscion." my dad said, sucking a noodle up. "Okay, daddy!" I said, dashing upstairs.
*********************************************************************
It'd been two hours. 8:03, my clock flashed. I sighed. My parents still hadn't made a desiscion. Suddenly, my door creaked open. My mom walked in. "So, have you decided yet?" I asked, eyes full of hope. I was dying to know. "Well, before I tell, I just want to let you know that your father and I took a lot of things into consideration." my mom said, looking deep into my eyes. "Okay, okay. What'd you decide?" I pryed. "We decided.... no." My mom said, grimacing. "Mom, no!" I yelled in protest. "Yes. It's final." my mom said, her lips pursed in a thin line. She meant business, but I still put up a fight. "Mom, You always ruin everything, including my entire life! Why do you have to be so annoying? Why can't I have a different mom, one who's actually a good mother?" I said, tears streaming down my face. "You know, some kids don't have a mother at all to talk with. You should be grateful." My mom said. "Well, guess what? Unfortunetly, my mother is alive. And I hate her!" I screamed. My mom looked hurt. "Well, if that's how you feel, I guess I can't stop you. I'm going to the store. I'll be back in an hour." my mom said, her voice cracking. I could tell she was on the brink of tears, but I didn't care one bit. I didn't respond to her. My face was buried in my pillow. I heard footsteps fading and heard my mom leave the room. My hands trembled with anger. I felt like screaming. I was just so angry.
********************************************************************
It had been almost 2 and a half hours. My clock read 10:43. Where was Mom?, I wondered, even though I was still fuming. My dad walked into my bedroom, his face stained with tears. He probably felt bad for not letting me go to camp, I thought. My dad sat down on my bed and put his hand on my leg. I got the feeling this wasn't about camp. "What's wrong, daddy?" I said, trying to comfort him, although I was worried myself. "Your mother." my dad said, his eyes glittering because they were wet. "What about her?" I said. I swallowed hard. I could hear my heart beating faster. "When she left for the store, she got into a car accident. She was stuck by an 18 wheeler. She died just a few minutes ago." my dad said, and another set of tears flowed down his face. "R-really?" I managed to whisper. My dad nodded solemnly. I broke into tears, this time for the loss of my mom, not the existence. I sobbed. I coudn't believe it. She was gone. Forever. "She did write you this note, though, right before she left." my dad said, handing me a piece of her stationary. "I'll let you read this alone." My dad said. He patted my leg and walked away. I picked up the note and began to read it;
Dear Zoey,
I am very sorry about tonight. I didn’t mean to upset you. But it was just too much for our family to handle. I know you are very angry with me. I know you think I am annoying and ruin everything, but I think you are the best child a mother could ever have. You’re funny, smart, clever, beautiful, outgoing, and everything else. We’ll talk tonight when I get back. And no matter how angry you are with me, or how angry I ever am with you, this will always stay the same- I will always love you.
Mom


Tears cascaded down my cheeks. I sniffled, my eyes red and puffy. She loved me- really, truly loved me. She thought I was wonderful. And we would never be able to talk again. I tried to remember what I said to her before she left us forever. I remembered. And I instantly began to sob again. The last three words I ever said to her were these- I hate you. I felt terrible. I barely slept for months. The thought haunted me. You never realize what you have until it's gone.
*************************************************************************
One night, I had a dream. I was in a wide open field. It was more colorful than a box of crayons. There were lilies, roses, lilacs, violets, daffodils, orchids, and every other type of flower. The sun shone brightly. Birds sang melodious songs in the trees. It was perfect, and what happened after made it even more perfect. My mom came out of the forest. She was wearing a baby blue sundress, her blonde hair waving slightly in the wind. Butterflies flew out. My mom approached me and sat down, her edges glowing, seeing as she was a spirit. "Zoey." my mom said, her harmonious voice floating in the air. Her eyes sparkled like morning dew on grass blades. "Mom." I replied, smiling. "Look, I am so sorry what I said to you. I really, truly, and absolutely love you." I apoligized. "I know, Zoey. And I love you too." my mom said, smiling, and everything around us seemed to brighten. "Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?" I asked hopefully. My mom smiled and stroked my cheek. "Of course I accept your apology. I could never stay mad at you." my mom said.
***************************************************************************
Here I am, three years later. I could sleep at night now. I still missed my mom, of course, but it had gotten better. I was so glad she loved me. And I was finally sure that she knew I loved her back.


THE END




I hope you like it! It took forever. I didn't really try on the other one. But on this one I did. HOPE IT'S GOOD!
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:00 PM   #72
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

Here are some tips for writer's block (We all get it at some point, I do all the time. )
~Read over your story. Be sure you are in touch with the text. (Unfarmiliar Writer's block is what I call it, normally happens when you return from a story after not working on it for a day or maybe less. )

~Go back to your notes ( Notes are very important. You should normally have some notes when you start a story), and even if you don't have anything written down, the notes might spark an idea.

~What(if any) lesson is being taught in the story? Think of ways you can portray that.

~Read. Reading other stories helps you write.(Whenever I have a serious writer's block, I just pick up a book and read. I normally get an idea somehow.)

~Go outside. Stare at the clouds. Ask yourself a question you can't answer. (Going outside clears my head, normally, and looking at the clouds, the shapes, makes my mind stir. Doing things outside just sparks creativity for some reason.)

~Drink lemonade. (I'm serious, whenever I have writer's block, and I drink lemonade, it normally helps. ??)

~Think about your life. Think about your own experiences. Read an old journal/ diary.

And if none of that stuff helps, that just means you're thinking too hard.


---------- TexasGirl8 added 6 Minutes and 0 Seconds later ----------

Okay, I read it. I'd like to PM you about something.

Last edited by TexasGirl8; 06-18-2008 at 08:00 PM.. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:10 PM   #73
turtle606
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

Sorry, mines kinda long.


Owen's Quest
:turt::gwolf::turt::gwolf::turt::gwolf::turt:by Turtle:turt::gwolf::turt::gwolf::turt::gwolf::turt:


Owen always stood out from the other wolf cubs. He was a shy wolf who always stayed in his den, cuddling with his mother as the other cubs his age laughed and played games like wrestling that would benefit them when they learned to hunt. Owen would stare out the opening of his den to see what was happening but never looked at cubs. He looked at the fathers cheering on their children as they played. But Owen was the only wolf that new that.
Owen looked at the father’s because deep down inside he wished he had one. Owen’s father, Millicent, had run off into the woods the morning after Owen was born. Owen was always been embarrassed for not having a father and perhaps that was why he never played with the other cubs, perhaps not. No one really knew, not even Owen himself. But Owen’s mom was tough and was able to survive the 1st part of Owen’s life without needing anyone else to help her.
When Owen was about 10 years old in human time, his mom, Maia, called him over from the way back of the den where he was sitting and thinking all by himself.
“Owen,” Maia began in her calm, soothing tone, “You are growing physically and mentally and I think it’s time to begin your training. You are to learn the ways of being a wolf so you can be able to live and take care of yourself when you get older. You are ready to go to the LearningPlace where I will teach you everything you need to know. Every cub your age from our pack and another pack who lives not to far away from here, will gather there in 5 sunrises. If we are to get there in time we must leave at dawn.”
By the time dawn came Owen was already awake eager and nervous about the new place they were going to. Owen was never allowed to go anywhere outside of the pack territory and he never did. Maia woke with a start and rushed out of the den. Giving no notice to Owen. Owen awkwardly rushed out of the den to follow her. The wind felt strange against his fur. He hadn’t been outside of the den for as long as he could remember.
“Are you ready?” Maia asked.
“I hope so,” responded Owen.
Maia gave no answer, instead she said “In order to make it to the LearningPlace, we will have to cross the ShadowForest, here, bigger wolves lurk in the shadows and vicious bears climb up trees and watch you, ready to pounce at any moment. If you look you can see the forest from here.”
Owen looked up and saw a huge cluster of thick, scary looking trees. More trees than he had ever seen in his life. His heart beat faster and faster till he couldn’t tell one beat from another and it felt like it would hop out of his chest.
When they finally reached the forest, Owen was more nervous then he could ever imagine, but without a word, Maia burst into the forest, forcing him to follow. It wasn’t scary at first. Owen pretended it was just a dream and he was really just back in the den, not here, where anything could happen. It was a good strategy until he met Kalkatath.
After 3 sunrises had passed, things were going well, but food was getting harder and harder to find. The days became colder and the nights were almost un-bearable. The sound of growling and the feeling of hunger drifted though the air, leaving a tiring effect on Owen. It’s almost over, Maia had reassured him. And it was. Soon they were able to see the forest opening in the distance. It was comforting to see. It was the only thing that kept Owen going.
On the evening of the 3rd sunrise, Owen and Maia saw a black figure blocking the entrance, but then it disappeared. Minutes later it appeared again, but closer this time. Bear. Bear. Bear. Keep Going. Faster. Bear. Bear. Bear. Owen heard his mother whisper to herself. Then the bear made its presence known.
“I AM KALKATATH, KING OF THE SHADOWS AND THIS IS MY TERRITORY. LEAVE NOW OR BE EATEN.” The bear, Kalkatath, had a big dark booming voice that matched his lead gray fur.
“No. My cub and I have a right to be here. Now leave us to our travels, we will leave your territory as soon as we can.” Maia said in a calm but surprisingly firm voice.
“IF YOU WILL NOT LEAVE THEN I CHALLENGE YOU TO A BATTLE.”
Then began a battle so fierce, Owen had to close his eyes. When it finally got quiet, Owen began to peak to see if it was over. Maia looked weak lying on the ground. Kalkatath was standing, panting loudly. Maia got up, using what looked like her final strength. She approached Kalkatath and swiped at his chest leaving a deep, red gash. Owen whimpered, then sprinted over to his mother who had collapsed on the forest floor. Kalkatath was limping away. It was safe.
She spoke in a faint, weak, stuttering voice and said, “Ohh…hh…..Owe….Owen, ggg.. go. Go to the LearningPlace. Learn fff,from Daviad. He can help. And fffind… your father.” With that she stopped. Just stopped. Owen could tell she had died. Now he was all-alone. By himself. Owen sobbed. He could have never thought this would happen. His mom was gone. Forever. Now it was up to Owen to fulfill Maia’s final request. He had to. It was his quest.



This is the beginning of a story I hope to continue in the later rounds. It is a trilogy series. That you sooo much again for the tips. they really helped me write this story because I had writer's block.
Old 06-18-2008, 08:14 PM   #74
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

View Post Originally Posted by TexasGirl8
Here are some tips for writer's block (We all get it at some point, I do all the time. )
~Read over your story. Be sure you are in touch with the text. (Unfarmiliar Writer's block is what I call it, normally happens when you return from a story after not working on it for a day or maybe less. )

~Go back to your notes ( Notes are very important. You should normally have some notes when you start a story), and even if you don't have anything written down, the notes might spark an idea.

~What(if any) lesson is being taught in the story? Think of ways you can portray that.

~Read. Reading other stories helps you write.(Whenever I have a serious writer's block, I just pick up a book and read. I normally get an idea somehow.)

~Go outside. Stare at the clouds. Ask yourself a question you can't answer. (Going outside clears my head, normally, and looking at the clouds, the shapes, makes my mind stir. Doing things outside just sparks creativity for some reason.)

~Drink lemonade. (I'm serious, whenever I have writer's block, and I drink lemonade, it normally helps. ??)

~Think about your life. Think about your own experiences. Read an old journal/ diary.

And if none of that stuff helps, that just means you're thinking too hard.


---------- TexasGirl8 added 6 Minutes and 0 Seconds later ----------

Okay, I read it. I'd like to PM you about something.
And, in my case, try and remember that dream it's based off of.
I should write, but I feel braindead...
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:15 PM   #75
turtle606
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

Sorry, I kinda changed the quote you wanted me to use, but it would've sounded weird had I not changed it.
Old 06-18-2008, 08:20 PM   #76
SmileeProductions™
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

It can be a new story, Right? Or do we have to keep going?
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:21 PM   #77
turtle606
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

Is that story true, Cattails? I feel like I'm gonna cry, and I thought my story was sad.
Old 06-18-2008, 08:24 PM   #78
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

View Post Originally Posted by turtle606
Is that story true, Cattails? I feel like I'm gonna cry, and I thought my story was sad.
Naw. I couldn't think of anything. My new one is, partially. It's from a dream I had the other night.
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:24 PM   #79
GymnastGirl724
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

????Cattails wrote her story already?
Old 06-18-2008, 08:26 PM   #80
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Default Re: WI's Next Top WRITER!! ~Season 1~

I don't know how mine will turn out. I am an off topic writer. Always have been, always will be
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