The Outsider... you think she is wierd, but she could be just like you...

[ChloePup]

The


Outsider


By: Lauren

As most know me, the weird, lame, looser, I am much more than that. I am an actual person too, as many probably don't know. I have feelings too. Ok. I have probably started out in the wrong place in my life. Here is my story.
I was raised on a small farm out in the middle of nowhere, to some, but to me, that was everywhere, and everything I had ever know or let alone, been. A quiet peaceful place, fifteen miles from the nearest town. A small creek runs gently and peacefully through my endless back yard. Birds chirp and the wind blows beautifully through the fields.
Living on that farm was my mother, father, and older brother, Jack, and my beloved border collie, Shep. My brother and I could always find something to do on the farm.

"Come on Leslie" Jack yelled. We were going to the creek to look for interesting rocks as we do almost every Saturday morning. "I'm coming!" I yelled back. "Come on Shep!!! Were going to the creek!!!" That made his ears point high. He loved to walk along the creek.
When we arrived at the creek, I looked at our favorite spot to search. I saw something that sparkled and gleamed under the big golden sun. I pointed it out to Jack then ran over to pick it up. When I got it, I went back to Jack so that he could see it. He took a look at it for a minute, and then said," It looks like a diamond!" We called for Shep, and then ran back to our green farm house.

When we got inside, our parents were sitting at our dinner table. They had an upset look on their faces. Jack asked them what was wrong. My father took a deep sigh then said, "Your mother and I have decided, after a lot of deep hard thinking, that we are going to move to New York." "NO!!!!!!!" I screamed. My mom then said, "We have both thought this through, and decided that it would be best for all of us.
Best for me, how?!? I had lived here at the farm for all my life. I was not ready to leave! New York seemed so far away, it sounded like it was on another planet! I thought and thought. I was scared. I didn't want to move!

Next part, comming soon

[starwartwilight]

Ooh!! That is really good!

[MaddieLynn]

I love the story- great job!

The only thing you should tweak is that it changes from past tense to present tense...

for example: "Let's go fishing," Maggie said. I smile and laugh. (that's not in your story, but it's an example of changing the tense..)

Good luck!

-Sydney